Ear­li­er this week, Theodore Ross wrote about the Man­hat­tan eruv. He will be blog­ging here all week for Jew­ish Book Coun­cil and MyJew­ish­Learn­ing.

I found my first error in my book in this sen­tence in the intro­duc­to­ry chap­ter, Hid­den Jew”: My step­fa­ther [Randy]…knew from very ear­ly on that my moth­er was Jew­ish. His rather con­ser­v­a­tive fam­i­ly didn’t, and they still don’t.”

This was, to the best of my knowl­edge, true at the time of my writ­ing it. There is, in fact, a lat­er, and longer, pas­sage in the book devot­ed to this very sub­ject: name­ly, that my moth­er was so proud about my suc­cess as a writer that she couldn’t help telling her fam­i­ly and friends in Mis­sis­sip­pi about it — but she was so com­mit­ted to keep­ing her Judaism a secret that she nev­er told them what the book was about. (I’ve writ­ten about this online in some detail. Please read here to see what I’m talk­ing about.)

Any­way, I recent­ly returned from a fam­i­ly trip to Mis­sis­sip­pi, where the dis­cus­sion of the book was very much a din­ner table top­ic. My step-grand­moth­er, Anne, a won­der­ful woman with whom I’ve always had a great, if-not-entire­ly-frank, rela­tion­ship, chimed in with this over our red beans and rice:

I sup­pose it’s time to let the cat out of the bag,” she said, hush­ing every­one. Right after your moth­er and Randy fell in love” — when I was about 12 or 13, or around 1986 — he said, Now, Mom, she doesn’t want any­one to know she’s Jew­ish. So don’t say any­thing.’”

There were a cou­ple of impli­ca­tions here. First, our cir­cum­spec­tion, or down­right lying, through the years had been for noth­ing — they had known we were Jew­ish. What’s more — and no one said this, but it was implied — they had known with­out our say­ing a thing, assum­ing it some­how from our man­ner, appear­ance, and atti­tudes. Which is a lit­tle dis­com­fit­ing, but still amus­ing from where I sit. As I have always said to my moth­er when­ev­er she tries on a bit of a south­ern accent: Ma, you can take the girl out­ta Queens. But you can’t take the Queens out­ta the girl.”

Theodore Ross is the author of Am I a Jew?: Lost Tribes Lapsed Jews, and One Man’s Search for Him­self. His writ­ing has appeared in the pages (print and elec­tron­ic) of the New York Times, Harper’s Mag­a­zine, the AtlanticTablet, Saveur, Tin House, and a vari­ety of oth­er jour­nals and news­pa­pers. He is also the arti­cles edi­tor of Men’s Jour­nal mag­a­zine.

Theodore Ross is the author of Am I a Jew?: Lost Tribes Lapsed Jews, and One Man’s Search for Him­self. His writ­ing­has appeared in the pages (print and elec­tron­ic) of the New York Times, Harper’s Mag­a­zine, the Atlantic, Tablet, Saveur, Tin House, and a vari­ety of oth­er jour­nals and news­pa­pers. He is also the arti­cles edi­tor of Men’s Jour­nal mag­a­zine, and per the typ­i­cal require­ments, lives in Brook­lyn with his wife and children.

Look­ing Up in New York

Revi­sions for the Paperback

Mr. Expert on God